I wonder if we have the right idea about enlightenment. I don't think it's an ultra-mystical experience reserved for super-special people who have practiced for eons. I think it's something that's quite ordinary, and is available to everyone. It's also something that you have to develop once you have it. It's also paradoxical in some ways.
Let me start by talking about saints. "High" churches (Catholic / Orthodox / Anglican) celebrate saints as people who have attained to a remarkable degree of holiness. Protestant and evengelical churches tend to celebrate as saints everyone who has decided to follow Jesus, even the junkie fresh off the street coming off of heroin. Both of these views are accurate, and I think they relate to enlightenment as well, if I can be allowed to draw a parallel.
Being a saint starts with seeing. Christian englightenment means seeing God and self at the same time. We see God, and in God's light, we see our self - our old, "false" self, perhaps, but our self nonetheless. Some say that Christian enlightenment means seeing the self as sinful, but I don't think this is everyone's experience. I already knew myself as sinful, but I didn't know that God was loving. When I finally met God, I found him loving, and my impression of myself was that I was finally loved. The issue of the old "sinful" self is always there, but people meet God in different ways, and the awareness of sin is not always primary, especially in people who are already aware of it. For me, I found a new identity - I'm loved. This new identity is what Christians understand as our "new self," re-created and energized with God's presence. Anyone who has this identity is considered a saint, no matter how far along the path they are. There is still a path, though - a constant practice of choosing to act out of your true identity, resting as a child infinitely loved of God, and not to act out of your old identity, an orphan who has to strive to prove himself in the hope of earning a love that never seems to come, and never seems to satisfy. Without good friends, prayer, grace, and wisdom, this path is very difficult. Those who keep on walking this path, and continue to grow even more than most, then, are also accurately called "saints." Either way, this is not a position that is a result of striving on their part. It's just an expression of people who have been extraordinarily willing to let themselves be carried on by love into true freedom.
From reading Zen texts, I have a similar impression of enlightenment. In fact, in many cases, Zen enlightenment looks like the Protestant expression of sainthood, ascribing "satori" to people who have just awakened to their own failure. This would correspond to the Christian "seeing the self as sinful" enlightenment. Of course, there are also "seeing the self as loved" enlightenment cases, and many other types as well. Here are a few of my favorite examples.
This is one of Zen Master Mazu Daoyi's encounters. Mazu comes a few generations before Rinzai (Linji) in the Chinese Zen lineages. I owe my friend and teacher Dr. Yamada, in whose book on Mazu I first encountered this dialogue, for his insight into the dynamics of the passage.
Lecture Master Liang came to see Mazu. Mazu asked him, “I hear that your lectures on the scriptures and commentaries are quite good. Is this true?”
“Oh, I wouldn’t go that far.” said Liang.
“And what do you use to lecture?”
“I use my mind to lecture.”
Mazu said, “The mind is like an actor, and thought like a clown. How can you explain the scriptures?”
Liang replied angrily, “If the mind can’t lecture, then I suppose you’d suggest that nothingness can?”
“In fact, nothing is quite good at lecturing,” said Mazu.
Unable to assent, Liang went out and started down the stairs.
Mazu called after him. “Lecture master—”
Without a thought, Liang turned to face him, and was suddenly enlightened. He immediately bowed reverently.
“This crazy monk! What’s he bowing for?” said Mazu.
Liang returned to his temple and addressed the monks there. “I thought that no one could better me when it came to lecturing on scriptures and their interpretations, but today, one word from Master Mazu has smashed to pieces all that I’ve done up until now.”
Liang immediately retired to the Western Mountains and was never heard from again.
In Zen encounters like this, you have to be ever-present, ever-ready to respond with your true self. In their encounter, Mazu, who is quite practiced at being true, wants Liang to quit putting on airs, trying to impress people while simultaneously ruining his true nature. When Mazu says that nothingness is good at lecturing, he means it. Mazu's way of "lecturing" is just to be frank and honest, to speak from the heart. The difference is that Liang is going around telling people that he speaks from his true mind, but it is only in order to impress them. Mazu, however, speaks from "nothing," from "no-self," which is simply the negative expression of true self. As Lao Tzu says, "It is just because he has no self that his self is realized." It is his no-striving self.
He tells Liang that his "true mind" is not true at all, that it's just an actor. Liang, like most of us do when we find ourselves criticized, instead of admitting his faults becomes indignant and goes on to defend himself. He strikes out at Mazu - "If my 'true mind' can't lecture, than what can? Nothing? Ha!" And Mazu smiles. "Actually, that's precisely what I'm trying to tell you! Why not give up the act?"
Liang leaves in a huff. Mazu sees another chance. Like I said, Zen encounters like this are about being ever-present, ready to respond with your whole being. Mazu catches Liang off-guard. "Sir- " he calls after him. Liang automatically turns around. "Huh?" No more Mr. But-This-Is-My-True-Mind. Just a normal guy, turning around without a thought. Now he's vulnerable, and he finally sees it. "Ok, ok. I get it. The mind is an actor. I'm not a big-shot Zen teacher. I'm actually a fraud." He bows. "Thanks. I'm not happy, but I get it."
Liang sees himself as a fake. This is his enlightenment. What he does with it, however, is up to him. Will he revel in despair over his lost sense of self, or will he discover a new identity, and become a true teacher, someone who can have compassion on fragile souls like himself? It's hard to say. Maybe he became a recluse and gave up. Or, maybe he just got out of the public spotlight. Maybe he started doing something more meaningful than trying to make a name for himself. Some of the most influential names in history, I'm convinced, remain unnamed.
It was Dazhu Huihai’s first time receiving teaching from Mazu.
Mazu asked, “Where did you come from?”
“From Great Cloud Temple in Yuezhou.”
“And what are you looking to do here?”
“I come seeking the Buddhadharma.”
Mazu said, “You have a great store of treasure in your own house, yet you are throwing it away, running about here and there. What are you doing? I don’t have anything here. What sort of Buddhadharma are you seeking?”
Dazhu bowed, and then asked, “What is this ‘treasure in my own house’?”
“The one asking me at this moment, you, are that treasure. You have all the tools you need and lack nothing; you can use it all freely. There’s no need to seek anything outside.”
Hearing this, Dazhu suddenly awakened to his true mind and danced for joy, giving thanks.
This is the one that I relate to the most. Dazhu was already a believer, but he thought he needed more, that there was some secret that he "wasn't getting." The only thing he didn't get, though, is that there wasn't anything to get! Let me put it in my own terms. I was always (subconsciously or otherwise) asking the question, "Am I OK?" ... "What do I have to do so that I'll be 'OK'?"
The answer is, "Yes." and "Nothing." For a certain type of person - the kind that strives for perfection and yet the more she looks, the more flaws she sees - this is good music to hear. You're OK. Stop trying so hard. You're ok. And in this case, that was enough to set Dazhu free.
I have to say, though, this is my favorite enlightenment story.
Jesus went across to Mount Olives, but he was soon back in the Temple again.
Swarms of people came to him. He sat down and taught them.
The religion scholars and Pharisees led in a woman who had been caught in a scandalous sex act.
They stood her in plain sight of everyone and said,
"Teacher, this woman was caught red-handed in the act of adultery. Moses, in the Law, gives orders to stone such persons. What do you say?"
They were trying to trap him into saying something incriminating so they could bring charges against him.
Jesus bent down and wrote with his finger on the dirt.
They kept at him, badgering him. He straightened up and said,
"The sinless one among you, go first; Throw the stone."
Bending down again, he wrote some more in the dirt.
Hearing that, they walked away, one after another, beginning with the oldest. The woman was lef alone. Jesus stood up and spoke to her.
"Woman, where are they? Does no one condemn you?"
"No one, Master."
"Neither do I," said Jesus. "Go on your way. From now on, dont sin."
Sex can be addictive, just like alcohol, narcotics, and sugar. We want love, but we can't find it. We find loveless sex - whether it's in pornography or in real live people - and it gives us a temporary release, a feeling of comfort. For many of us, this becomes addictive. To a greater or lesser extent, it becomes compulsive, and we can't control it. This woman desperately wanted love, and she knew that she was doing something that didn't line up with her values, but she couldn't stop. She kept getting the better of herself.
Until she got caught. In front of everyone - all of her shame exposed and magnified. Nothing is worse for addiction than shame. Guilt is the feeling that "I did something bad." This feeling frees us to make wiser decisions in the future. Shame is the feeling that "I am bad." There's something wrong with me. Shame binds us into repeating the same mistakes over and over, and feeds our compulsion, even against our own will. And to top it off, she's judged. "This woman is just what she had thought about herself all along. She's bad. Kill her, o good teacher, as our rules demand."
Silence. They're looking for a fight. "Answer a fool in his folly and you'll be just like him," goes the proverb. Jesus knows more than to get drawn in to a stupid debate. They keep pestering, so he answers. "You want to judge? Go ahead. Make sure you judge yourself too, though." Because that's what judgment does. That's why we say that "Only God can judge." God's judgment does not look like harsh justice. Remember, Jesus is perfect theology. There may be parts of the Bible that make God look different, but someone who follows Jesus needs to take his life as their theology, and let mystery be mystery for the time being. Here's God's judgment: "I don't judge you."
He tells her, "Go on your way. And stop doing what you were doing." These are not mere words. You can't see it on the surface, but there's something amazing happening during this dialogue. The woman's shame - the emotional wounds that are compulsively driving her to repeat this behavior that she wants to be free from - is exposed, and she's even threatened with death. This is a picture for all of us who feel shame. This is our worst imaginable end - the very thing that we're ashamed of, that we feel we must hide at all costs, is exposed, and to our worst fears, our expectation even, is condemned... Until someone speaks the truth. "No, actually, you're OK in my book. I still love you. Don't worry."
Infinite depths of despair and shame just got erased in an instant at those words. Now she's loved. Now she's free. Jesus said "stop sinning" here because he had empowered her to do so. God never gives us impossible cammands without the power to see them through. If you find yourself unable to live up to God's standard, give yourself a break and stop trying so hard for a minute. Nothing Jesus says - "love each other" or even "love your enemies" - comes without the power to see it through. If you're constantly failing, your sin isn't actually the problem. Talk to yourself the way you long to be spoken to, with gentleness and forgiveness. You can never shame yourself into being good. The only thing that makes us good is being loved.
Enlightenment is for everyone, but it doesn't happen the same way for everyone. The same is true of Christian salvation. The consistent theme seems to be seeing - seeing God as God is, and / or seeing yourself as you are. For perfectionists, it means seeing that they are acceptable as they are. For the proud, it means seeing their imperfections. For those with deep wounds, it means being healed. Psalm 107 gives a beautiful illustration of the various ways in which people come to meet God. Here, salvation looks like a desert wanderer finding a city. It looks like a criminal in a dark prison crying out and being set free. It looks like someone distressed and depressed, caught up in their own tangled web, set free with words of healing. It looks like sailors caught in a storm, when all of a sudden God hushes the waves and makes the sea still as glass. It looks like deserts turned to water, and hungry people fed. It's not always so simple as "first you have to know you're a sinner then you have to accept Jesus into your heart." That's fine, but it just doesn't always look like that.
Shakuhachi enlightenment ("Ichi-on Jo-butsu", or "Become a Buddha in One Sound") seems to refer to expressing yourself just as you are in each sound that you play, or being completely present to that sound in the moment. To me, it means "playing in faith." You can't control what you experience or feel, but in my case, I can play believing that God hears what I'm expressing. If it makes you take up the attitide that "I'm enlightened and they're not," however, it's definitely not enlightenment. When faced with this sort of discussion, Suiko-sensei often says "Shakuhachi is for playing." Maybe that's the best advice.